It occurred to me this morning, that it is really logical for people who've grown up with challenging childhoods to have a victim consciousness. If grim things are happening to you, why wouldn't you think there is something wrong with you? That you don't know how to do being alive without it being painful?
The invitation from our higher selves is to rise above the story of our lives, and feel grateful for what we do have, and focus on being present in our lives, and see how we can help others along the way. The miracle though is that the universe reflects to you all the hurt parts of you that need healing... so if you've experienced a lot of loss, and were unable to fully heal, the chances are you will attract circumstances that open the wound again, so you can fully heal it. We're on a healing journey, even though it's painful.
I'll give you an example. I'd been given a beautiful diamond ring for my 50th birthday. I loved it. One day I looked down and saw that one of the main diamonds had fallen out, and it looked like a witch's mouth gaping at me, with missing teeth. I was distraught and furious. How could this be happening to me? Couldn't I have anything that I really adored? I was on a group call that night, and one guy said, all I can hear is loss and anger - does that resonate at all with you? In that moment I knew, what I was not bringing fully to my foreground, was that it was a year since my dear friend of 30 years had taken her life, and that I was minimising my feelings. Losing the ring made the connection and I felt into the depth of them. It was a reminder that hidden hurts cannot be ignored, in the same way you can't lock a troublesome child in a cupboard just because they are being annoying! Our inner children need all the love and compassion we can give them.
So my insight today, is that we are on a hero/ine's journey in our lives, as we navigate the circumstances that apparently happen to us. The act of faith is that we have signed up for this healing journey by coming into the world, and that we are developing the inner tools and strength, with the help of others along the way. And by sharing our loves and losses with others, we can heal others, too.
If you'd like to have company on your hero's journey, do get in touch. Also I'd love to hear any insights you might have prompted by this post as a comment below.